How to Use Scaffolding to Get Your Kids to Actually Stop Hitting Once and For All and Other Reasons Scaffolding Works
I’m a special education teacher. One of my job’s is to write individualized goals for each of my students.
For example, one of my students might have a goal to read 150 words correct per minute on a grade level passage.
Let’s say, currently, she is averaging reading 90 words correct per minute.
The next day after writing the fluency goal for my student, I have her come into my class and read a passage. Predictably, she reads about 90 words.
Now imagine if I said, “Stop reading 90 words per minute,” and I continued to say that every time she read around 90 words.
In fact, I would even say, “Stop reading 140 words correct per minute,” if she reaches that 140 word mark because after all 140 words correct per minute is not her goal.
That’s all I did.
Would my student reach her goal? Maybe, eventually down the road (or more likely if she got a better teacher haha).
But, I would imagine it would take a long time to reach her goal, if she ever did. And I would also venture to say that she would probably be pretty discouraged and unmotivated to want to continue.
Now, let’s use a similar example when it comes to parenting.
Currently, we have a child who hits and ultimately our goal is for our child to stop hitting.
Parent: “STOP HITTING!”
Parent: “I TOLD YOU TO STOP HITTING!” Punishes (takes away a toy or puts child in time-out).
Parent: Frustrated 🤦
Lauren Barrett is a multi-passionate mom working to help all parents become their best selves and build positive relationships with their kids through mindful parenting. She has a degree in deaf education and a Master’s in Reading Education. She is a high school teacher of the Deaf and hard-of-hearing by day, a cross country coach by the afternoon, a writer/author by her son's nap times, and a full time mom to an amazing preschooler. Lauren is a 3x author of the Add One-A-Day 30 Day Challenge, children's book, Henry's Hiccups, and parenting guide Now What? Mindful Checklists for Life's Hard Parenting Moments, a blogger at Lauren Barrett Writes, and has been published on sites like A Fine Parent, Pregnant Chicken, Pop Sugar, Her View From Home, and Scary Mommy. She loves her faith, running, visiting MLB stadiums with her husband, chocolate, scrapbooking, pretending she would actually do well on the Amazing Race, re-watching The Office, listening to Bobby Bones, and helping out all moms. She lives in North Carolina with her husband, James, and son, Henry. Follow her on Instagram at @laurenbarrettwrites, and get her free guide on what to do during the middle of a tantrum.
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