I’m a special education teacher. One of my job’s is to write individualized goals for each of my students.

For example, one of my students might have a goal to read 150 words correct per minute on a grade level passage.

Let’s say, currently, she is averaging reading 90 words correct per minute.

The next day after writing the fluency goal for my student, I have her come into my class and read a passage. Predictably, she reads about 90 words.

Now imagine if I said, “Stop reading 90 words per minute,” and I continued to say that every time she read around 90 words.

In fact, I would even say, “Stop reading 140 words correct per minute,” if she reaches that 140 word mark because after all 140 words correct per minute is not her goal.

That’s all I did.

Would my student reach her goal? Maybe, eventually down the road (or more likely if she got a better teacher haha).

But, I would imagine it would take a long time to reach her goal, if she ever did. And I would also venture to say that she would probably be pretty discouraged and unmotivated to want to continue.

Now, let’s use a similar example when it comes to parenting.

Currently, we have a child who hits and ultimately our goal is for our child to stop hitting.

Child: Hits

Parent: “STOP HITTING!”

Child: Hits

Parent: “I TOLD YOU TO STOP HITTING!” Punishes (takes away a toy or puts child in time-out).

Child: Hits
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Parent: Frustrated 🤦

In education, I don’t only just write goals. I map out a plan to help my students reach their goals.

Along their way to reaching their goals, I have objectives (or checkpoints), and I use scaffolding and interventions to help them get there.

I can’t expect my students to go from their current behavior to their goal behavior in one gigantic leap.

That would be like jumping from the bottom of the stairs to the top or jumping from the bottom of a building to the top. The end result is most likely going to end in them failing miserably.

We need all the in between stuff to help us get to the top.

In a similar sense, how can we expect kids to go from hitting to not hitting just by telling them.
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The scaffolding and teaching part are missing.

Think of it in terms of construction. It’s what helps the workers reach the top.

It’s a metaphor for providing students with temporary, supportive structures that, just like in constructing a structure, are “gradually removed as the building nears completion.” (Riddett, 2015).

When a student demonstrates proficient independence, the scaffold is no longer needed (Gibbons, 2002).
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When it comes to hitting, types of scaffolding can be…

• Physically guiding their hands to what they are supposed to do.
• Verbally telling them what to do with their hands instead of hitting.
• Role-playing with stuffed animals or dolls.
• Remove yourself, so they won’t hit you.
• Providing objectives and praise/reward them when they reach that objective.

It’s frankly absurd to expect kids to go from a current behavior to a goal behavior just like that without any in betweens. It’s simply too hard. And not to mention developmentally inappropriate.

Imagine if you never ran before in your life and then all of a sudden you were told to run a marathon. No way, right?

Kids need to be taught how to not hit through scaffolding, practice, and reinforcement.

When our kids see themselves make progress, they are more likely going to want to continue to make progress.
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Scaffolding helps kids:

• Retain new information
• Gain more autonomy and independence
• Bridge learning gaps
• Feel less frustrated and confused
• Increase motivation
• Improves communication between parent and child

My son when he was a toddler, along with many other toddlers, would hit.

Toddlers, when angry, have no idea any other way to express their frustration than hit, throw, kick, bite, or tantrum….that is until we teach them.

So if you have a kid who hits, guess what? Your child is normal.

But it’s not fun, and, of course, we eventually want them to learn to express their anger in a different way.

So here’s what to do…

#1 Break down your goal behavior into objectives
Hitting → Screaming → Stomping → Hitting a pillow or stuffed animal → Squeezing hands into fists → Saying, “I want to hit you,” first before hitting → Scribbling an angry picture → Pounding play doh → Hugging themselves → Using the ASL sign for “angry → Taking deep breaths → Verbally expressing that they are angry and need some time alone.

These are just some examples and a pretty exhaustive list that we certainly do not expect our kids to all the way reach or do every single one in such perfect succession.
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*Some adults can’t even do all of these.”

​#2 Teach
In order to teach your child not to hit, you need to tell them what to do and how to replace the behavior of hitting.

As previously mentioned, when it comes to hitting, types of scaffolding can be…

• Physically guiding their hands to what they are supposed to do.
• Verbally telling them what to do with their hands instead of hitting.
• Role-playing with stuffed animals or dolls.
• Remove yourself, so they won’t hit you.
• Providing objectives and praise/reward them when they reach that objective.

#3 Practice
When it comes to learning a new behavior, we all need practice to master it. We can’t just tell our kids one time what we expect them to do. We need to allow them to practice what they learn.

For example, our child gets angry and hits. We take their hands and guide them to what we want them to do or model what we feel like they can do developmentally (i.e. maybe scream instead of hit).

When they are calm, we remind them of what we want them to do instead of hitting and then practice with them.

I call these GREENLIGHT STRATEGIES.

#4 Reinforce
To reinforce the behaviors we want, we need to provide praise and modeling.

PRAISE: When they hit an objective, we praise them for what they did right.
“You told me that you wanted to hit me, but then stopped yourself. Good job!”
“You hit me, but then knew that that was wrong and hugged yourself instead. Awesome!”
“Did you just scream instead of hitting? Highfive!”

MODELING: Model how you behave when you get angry and let your child see.
“Ugh my cup broke. I’m really angry. I feel like punching something, but I’m going to take a couple of deep breaths instead.”

Another great way to provide reinforcement is to actually create a visual like one of those thermometers companies use for fundraising.

At the top, write the goal behavior and all the way down the thermometer write your child’s objectives. Each time they hit a new one, allow your child to color in the thermometer.

Now, your child is taking the independence of tracking his own progress!

#5 Take Away the Scaffolding
Once your child is successfully and consistently hitting their objectives, you can take away your supports.

Maybe you stop physically showing them what to do. Then, remove your verbal input.
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Until finally, they are doing it all on their own.

Scaffolding works and will ultimately lead your child to their goal behavior much quicker than yelling, punishing, threatening, and bribing.

With scaffolding, your child is learning a new behavior to replace the inappropriate one and helping them reach a point of independence.

That is always our goal as parents — to raise kids who can become independent, self-regulated adults!
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Click here to get my Scaffolding Guide where I break down 20 goal behaviors, like staying in bed, eating the dinner you made, pooping on the potty, into actionable, developmentally appropriate objectives.

Imagine earning $50 or more for an hour’s worth of work? It’s possible with blogging! 

While blogging is just my side hustle at this time to earn extra spending cash, the rates some of these sites pay can be lucrative if you consistently keep at it. 

Right now, I typically only write one blog a week. Sometimes, I put it on my own website and other times I pitch other websites. 

The overall process only takes 1-3 hours, depending on how in depth the blog is and how much research is required. And if I’m averaging about $100 for these blogs, that rate is excellent for minimum work doing something I enjoy.

I signed up to receive weekly emails from Freedom With Writing. Each week, they break down websites that are accepting pitches that pay from guest bloggers! 

Here are 17 websites that I’ve had the most success and ease with earning extra cash blogging. Click on the title of the website to be taken to their How to Write for them page. 

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Pregnant Chicken covers all things babies from pregnancy to childbirth or adoption and being a new parent. 

They are going to want to see a completed piece of 300 words or more first. Then, they’ll email if it is or isn’t a right fit for their website. 

In my experience, they typically respond within a week which is a fast turnaround. 

Rate: $100

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I stumbled upon Hubpages years ago. I would publish blogs at random and without much thought to getting paid.

Eventually, I could link my PayPal account and configure their Ad Program and Amazon Program to my blog. 

For years, I made cents. But then, all of a sudden that money started compounding, and I would get paid $50, $75, $90 a month. 
The money isn’t consistent (But I also don’t blog on the site consistently), but it’s nice to get that surprise $50+ paycheck several months a year. 

Here’s how it works: 

• Set up a Hubpage account. 
  
• Write a blog on anything, except personal essays that read like a diary entry. 
  
• Your story will get featured on the Hubpage site. 
  
• Then, you have the option of submitting your blog to one of Hubpages subsidiary sites OR they’ll reach out to you recommending your blog for a specific site. 
  
• That is what you want! Once your blog goes to one of their bigger sites, more views and more money will start coming in. 
  

Rate: You can’t cash out until you reach $50 for a month. 

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Medium works in the same vein as Hubpages. Join their Partnership Program once you meet the criteria and get paid monthly based on member reading time.

I would repost a lot of my old blogs onto the site (They allow repurposing blogs), but didn’t have much luck besides literally like 10 cents a month. 

Then, I looked more into it and, just like Hubpages, I can submit a blog to one of their bigger sites which will help your blog get more views. 

I was accepted to Better Humans and have two blogs on that site which, as of now, are earning me around $10 a month. 

Not much, but it’s something. And it’s also something I can look into getting more serious about. 

Rate: Will vary based on views

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I’ll be honest. I’ve stopped blogging for PopSugar mainly because I thought the $50 for one post was too low, and I wasn’t hearing back from them as much. 

However, PopSugar is a big named site and blogging for them can lead to other opportunities. When I blogged for them, Elise Tate, influencer and wife of NFL star Golden Tate, and I connected. This led to some business opportunities, but it wasn’t that profitable, and promoting other people’s works wasn’t what I wanted to do.

But after a while, for me money was more important than clout. LOL. 

However, here’s how I started making money…

I sent them an article I wrote and after weeks (actually I think it might have been months), they emailed me back saying that they liked my article and invited me to join their Voices Community. 

Once in the community, I could pitch my own ideas, or I could accept pitches they suggested to me. They also sent out a monthly guide of what they wanted to see that month. 

Most of my pitches got accepted, and I enjoyed writing for them for the time-being. 

Rate: $50

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This website wants your personal essays on mental health recovery stories. To submit to them, send them an email with your full story in the body of the email. 
I shared with them a story of how I recovered from insomnia, and they really liked it. 
I went through two rounds of edits, and the final copy will be published in May. 
Rate: $150

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I’ve written five articles for this site, and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed working with their team. 
The submission process was easy. 

I shared with them my full essay, and they would respond back in a timely manner with their interest. 

After that I would go through 1-2 rounds of edit which were fairly simple. The editor would make suggestions, and I would approve. 

A Fine Parent accepts articles on parenting, especially positive strategies that work. 

I’ve written about building resilience, shy kids, greenlight strategies, and handling tantrums. 

Rate: $75

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Lisa is looking for articles on Blogging, Freelance Business, Work/Life Balance, and Tips for Working from Home with Kids.

She first wants to see your pitch and a workable outline. Once she accepts your article, you’ll share your full post in an editable Google Doc. 

I went through one round of edits before the post was published. 

Lisa was very easy to work with, and I enjoy her content. 

Rate: $50

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Motherfigure is looking for stories on motherhood and your journey toward it. They seek pitches on pregnancy, childbirth, infertility, nursing, and postpartum.

They want you to send a brief pitch first and then once accepted they will work with you to flesh out your article. 

Rate: $100

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I think writing for the Chicken Soup books is the easiest I’ve ever earned money. They aren’t looking for anything long (1200 words or less) and I barely had to do any edits. 

They have call outs throughout the year on various topics. I’ve written twice on the topics of “Me Time” and “Christmas.” 

Submit your story online to them, and then they’ll be in touch only if you’ve been accepted. 

Rate: $200

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I wrote two articles for this website under their Corona Diaries series. They want to see the full story first before making their decision. 

I’m not sure if they are still taking stories for this series, but according to their website, it looks as if they might still be. 

Rate: $35

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Chalkbeat is looking for first person narratives on education. They accept pitches from educators, advocates, parents, and students.

They are seeking original stories on your own personal experience with the education system. 

They ask you to either send a pitch or draft.

Rate: Not specified on the website, but I believe I got $100

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According to their website, Our Teen is a publication for parents of teenagers—middle school, high school, and up to the first year or two of college—and for professionals working with teenagers. Our mission is to be a trusted source—and a fun, informative read!—for readers who are seeking information about teenagers.

They want to see a pitch first. 

I submitted two articles and went through about one round of edits. Nothing hard. 

Rate: The rate is not specified on their site, but I asked and got $75 for both articles. 

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I’m not seeing their submission page on their website, but it doesn’t hurt to send them an email with an idea or draft. 

They accept a wide range of topics from Mom Life to Kids and Relationships.
I wrote a humorous piece about kids activities that look glamorous on Instagram but aren’t in real life. 

Rate: I got paid $50

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This parenting site especially loves parenting humor. They accept previously published and unpublished content, but only original essays are considered for payment. 

I wrote a piece about Quiet Quitting Instagram. 

Send pitches by email. 

Rate: Website doesn’t say how much you get paid, but I got $25

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Get Me Giddy is the world’s largest sexual health platform. I’m in the midst of working with them right now, so I technically haven’t gotten paid yet.

I am writing a piece on infertility. 

I had to pitch them first and then they sent back to me an agreement and the writer’s guidelines. Based on their writing guidelines, they want two interviews or quotes from expert sources. 
Have a pitch? Here’s the email information (Updated 11/27/22):

• Lifestyle topics/sexual health: [email protected] (Hannah), [email protected] (Trent), [email protected] (not sure of name!)
• Men’s health: [email protected] (Mike), [email protected] (Andrew)
• Women’s health: [email protected] (Nicole), [email protected] (Ashley)

Rate: $350

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I’m not seeing a submission’s page anymore, but it never hurts to reach out. 

They want to see unique stories on the family that are outside of what the traditional family looks like. 

Think adoption, biracial families, step families

Rate: $100

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There you have it - 17 websites to earn some extra spending cash. 

I love the fact that I can get paid to do something that I love and that it doesn’t feel like work at all. 

And I want you to feel the same empowerment when I get paid for my creativity and words. 

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