Ahh Kyle, my perfect brother.
What many of you probably don’t know is that Kyle has been perfect for a long time. His perfection has reigned upon us long before Barstool was even a glimmer in his eye and the No Swag moniker graced us with its presence on Twitter.
No, his perfect era commenced the moment the eye liner goatee was drawn upon his tiny face and he donned the oversized suit jacket. The moment he transformed - nay became - his most coveted persona, Roger Chan.
Who is Roger Chan? Let me first back up to an interview conducted by the Starr** Magazine back in 2022.
The Rise of Bauer and Company (aka B Co)
We are all familiar with Kyle’s successful singing debut Dragonfly Sinner (Salmon Sunset) in the band Gaze, but fans of the 5’6, “stronger than he is short,” singer will be shocked to know that Kyle was in a singing and acting troupe years before the Gaze men were nailing it in in Southern California by rocking, rolling, and banging. Annals of Bauer History will confirm there was once a group called Bauer and Company that Kyle was in, but, of course you don’t know that because Kyle is too humble to tell you about it.
The year was 1997 and Kyle, a tiny tot, was hanging out with his two older female cousins and Lauren, his older sister in New Jersey. Like any other bored youths of the time, they came up with the idea to start a band.
And that was how the birth of Bauer and Company came to be.
“Yeah, my cousins and sisters forced me to wear fuzzy sweaters and twirl and sing and prance about to songs we wrote. Little did they know that they were pushing me into eventually being part of the Gaze community…Nick, Donny, our producers, and all our fans. I owe my success to B and Co,” Kyle, the smallest newborn, responded when asked what he credits his newfound fame and fortune to.
Bauer and Company topped the charts with hit songs like “I Don’t Care Where We Go,” “I Don’t See the Beach,” and “I’m a Little Seal Girl,” (which was later found to be directly stolen from Nickelodeon's As Told By Ginger).
The group spent their summers touring and performing all over New Jersey in their grandma’s and aunt’s/uncle’s houses and producing videos for their special out on Home Videos.
But the fame and success of singing wasn’t enough. They decided they had to break into the acting world.
Kyle's highlight reel of Bauer and Company
Bauer and Company Take Acting By a Storm
The quartet, together with their dads: Doug Wanoy, Lauren and Kyle’s dad and also a heavy Lib on Twitter (who is bound to take things too far one day and get canceled by the masses) and Syd Barrett, their uncle (not to be confused with singer and guitarist Syd Barrett of Pink Floyd), host of the podcast You Can’t Handle the Truth with their grandma and who also has an alter ego on social media (Syd isn’t his real name), took acting by the storm all over the BROAD entryWAY of the house.
Our rendition of King Arthur (clips have been edited and shortened). This is produced by my oldest cousin who was a theater major and now theater teacher. She is actually probably the most talented of the family.
They would perform plays complete with curtains and all in front of their moms and grandma before the adults begged them to do more but to film it first instead.
Kyle, the little thespian that he is, always took on the lovable role of the perfect, tiny boy.
When asked to describe Kyle’s acting chops, Kyle’s cousin who wishes to remain nameless because she doesn’t the crave attention like the men in the family, said this:
“Kyle, while he never had the shining star role, was always the missing puzzle piece to the whole production. The adorable way he didn’t make eye contact with the camera was endearing. He was also well trained. I remember in one Christmas play we performed he refused to wear a coat in one of the outdoor scenes. I guess he didn’t like the way it felt, but his sister, Lauren, was furious that he wasn’t committed to the part. Not wearing a coat because of the fabric? Odd, this tic? you ask. Some may say so, but I don’t think it was odd at all. The audience ate up all of Kyle’s little quirks. I just think Kyle knew how to play each of his parts to perfection. Has he told you about Roger Chan yet?
Roger Chan and the Perfect Family
Lauren Barrett is a multi-passionate mom working to help all parents become their best selves and build positive relationships with their kids through mindful parenting. She has a degree in deaf education and a Master’s in Reading Education. She is a high school teacher of the Deaf and hard-of-hearing by day, a cross country coach by the afternoon, a writer/author by her son's nap times, and a full time mom to an amazing toddler. Lauren is a 3x author of the Add One-A-Day 30 Day Challenge, children's book, Henry's Hiccups, and parenting guide Now What? Mindful Checklists for Life's Hard Parenting Moments, a blogger at Lauren Barrett Writes, and has been published on sites like A Fine Parent, Pregnant Chicken, Pop Sugar, Her View From Home, and Scary Mommy. She loves her faith, running, visiting MLB stadiums with her husband, chocolate, scrapbooking, pretending she would actually do well on the Amazing Race, re-watching The Office, listening to Bobby Bones, and helping out all moms. She lives in North Carolina with her husband, James, and son, Henry. Follow her on Instagram at @laurenbarrettwrites, and get her free guide on what to do during the middle of a tantrum.
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