14 Must-Buy Open-Ended Toys to Promote Independent Play for Little Kids

5/21/2022

One of my favorite things to do is listen and watch my 3-year old son independently play.

It’s so cute to see the way their minds work and all the imaginative scenarios they act out.

The other day he was using his play mat to build a castle and racing his cars through it. He was so proud to show off what he was doing too. It melted my heart.

But how did we get there? Let’s explore some key ideas of how to foster independent play for toddlers before we arrive at the best open ended toys.

Why do we want to encourage independent play?
How do we encourage independent play?
What are open-ended toys?
14 must-buy open-ended toys
Household items used for independent play

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Why do we want to encourage independent play?

Play is work for kids. Their job is literally to play. And, they don’t need adults to participate in play. We, actually, stifle play and creativity. Our presence gets in their way.

Susie Allison of the BusyToddler says that adults (with great intentions) cause a shift in the play that removes: responsibility from the child, the chance for problem solving, and the way play is structured.

That’s why independent play is such a win! Win for our toddler because they are developing important lifelong skills. And a win for us because it takes away the guilt and pressure to feel like we have to be doing MORE.

Does this mean we can never play with our kids? Of course not. If we want to jump in from time to time, we should. This just means that if we don’t want to play with our kids, we should definitely not feel bad about it.

Where parents are necessary in building those connections is through reading together, modeling appropriate behaviors and actions, conversations in the car, dinner table, or on a walk, working through problems and solutions, and being their guide in the world.

They don't need us to play. Play is innate.

Research show other benefits of important play for little kids:

It enhances brain structure and function.
Promotes executive function (the process of learning)
Supports the formation of the safe, stable, and nurturing relationships
Promote the social-emotional, cognitive, language, and self-regulation skills
Better able to think creatively and multitask.
Increased quality and quantity of language.
Pretend play encourages self-regulation.

Now that we know how crucial independent play is, we can ask ourselves the next question.

How do we encourage independent play?

I am not going to dive deeply into each one. I go into each one more deeply in my course, Now What?

But here are 8 steps to encourage independent play.

Start by playing together.
Gradually back away for a very short period of time. Like 1-2 minutes. Maybe even less depending on your child. No matter how long they played without you, PRAISE them. Increase this time by a few seconds each time you play.
Sprinkle in time-ins throughout the day to fill up your child’s attention cup.
Be honest with why you won’t play with them. “I need to work, but I’ll be close by.” “I really like watching you play.”
Once your kid is engaged in play, stay out of it. No need to pepper them with questions. That’s annoying and disrupts their work.
Create a “yes space.” They should be able to play with and touch mostly everything in their play area.
Make play a part of their everyday routine.
Buy the right toys.

Now that you have the 8 steps to encourage independent play, we have come to our next question.

What are open-ended toys and why are they the right kind of toys?

Here is the criteria for open-ended toys:

A good toy is one of the following:

Grows with your child.
Sparks imagination and creativity.
Lets your child take the lead.
Isn’t loud, flashy, and does all the work.
Sturdy and durable.
Pretend play (doctors kits, tool kits, dress up clothes).

We want our kids to have to struggle and think a bit and that can be encouraged by the kinds of toys we buy.

Which brings me to our next to last question…

What are 14 must-buy open-ended toys?

1. Magnatiles

These magnetic shapes promote mental growth in kids while learning core STEM concepts and developing critical thinking skills.

What I like about these tiles is that they are not easy but the end results are satisfying. They build resilience.

2. Building blocks

Research has shown that block play supports the development of social skills, abstract thinking, creativity, mathematical thinking, and literacy.

My son can not only learn the ABCs and words that begin with each letter with his blocks, but he can use them to build structures, ramps, and towers.

3. Toy vehicles

Toy vehicles enhance cognitive thinking such as basic physics and math. They support motor skills and interactive play.

My son has a bucket full of toy cars, trains, and trucks that get hours of play every day.

4. Pretend People

Pretend people (action figures, dolls, magnetic people, wooden people, plastic people) boosts creative play, inclusivity, and storytelling.

We use our pretend people to act out all kinds of real life situations. When buying fake people, it’s important to include a diverse set of races, abilities, and ethnicities, and genders.

5. Pretend food/kitchen

Pretend food and kitchens help with language development and motor skills.

My son has used his kitchen and food to play restaurant and call the “cook man” to order take out.

6. Dress up clothes

Dressing up is a form of imaginative play. It encourages creative thinking and communication skills.

Have a little box or bin where kids can freely pull out dress up clothes whenever they want.

7. Kits

In addition to the dress up clothes, have pretend kits on hands. For example, doctor play kits, tool kits, hair salon kits, etc.

In the same way, play kits encourage creative thinking and communication skills.

8. Puzzles

Puzzles are great for hand-eye coordination and fine motor skills. They also work on building self-esteem and problem-solving.

We have a few puzzles related to our son’s interests that he enjoys.

9. Easel or chalkboard

Every kid needs a large space where they can create. We have a double sided easel/chalkboard and it’s been the canvas for menus for restaurants, tic-tac-toe games, drawings, the letter of the day, and so much more.

10. Floor mats

I love floor mats for kids. We have one of a town. It opens the door for imagination. My son has raced cars on it and has used his building blocks to add to the city houses, hospitals, schools, and fire stations.

11. Stacking cups

Stacking cups or blocks help develop fine motor skills and explore concepts like early math, geometry, problem-solving, and cause and effect.

The stacking cups and blocks have also been used to build ramps and bridges. They have served as bedrooms and living rooms to houses and a jail to a robber.

12. Tents, forts, tunnels, houses

I would spend hours as a kid with my friends building a whole system of houses, tents, tunnels, and forts throughout our basement. We reenacted many different scenarios while playing in those houses, letting our imagination run wild.

These playhouses, tents, tunnels, and forts let your kids foster their curiosity and creativity.

13. Play dough or kinetic sand

Okay, these things can be messy, so make sure you have a designated space for your kids to play with these things, or you’ll be digging play dough and sand out of the carpet for days.

Play dough and kinetic sand are such sensory materials for kids and can be quite calming to play with.
I like to add to their playtime experience by getting different tools to be used with each. For play dough, I’ve bought cutting and rolling tools to chop, shape, and flatten the play dough. I’ve also bought cookie cutters, so my son can make different animals in the play dough.

For the kinetic sand, you can put it in a long, shallow plastic bin. Add trucks, rocks, sand toys, water, shovels, blocks, etc to make it a whole sensory bin.

14. Bubbles

Bubbles are great for the brain. Playing with them helps your kids work on oral motor skills, gross motor skills, cognitive development, eye tracking skills, and joint attention. Read more here.

You can get bubbles where your kids have to blow themselves or those machines that create bubbles and your kids can run and pop them.

There you have it! 14 open-ended toys to promote independent play for little kids.

But…

We are not finished yet. We still have one more question to ask. Are toys the only thing to use to promote independent play?

No!

What are the best household items used for independent play?

That’s right. Everyday items found around the house work just as well for independent play and often don’t cost a cent.

At first, you can model how you play with these items or give them some ideas if they are struggling.

But really simply setting these items out and letting your kids figure out what to do with them is all you need to do.

I’m going to list 14 of the best items and link some ways to use these items.

1. Cardboard box

I included activities to do with cardboard boxes but, honestly, you can just set out the cardboard box with some markers and let our kids take the reins.

My son can spend hours doodling all over a broken down box.

2. Markers

3. Mirrors

4. Painters Tape

5. Butcher Paper

6. Kitchen Items

7. Pom Poms

8. Dirt

9. Old Clothes from Your Closet

10. Blankets

11. Toilet Paper Tubes

12. Flashlights

13. Plastic Cups

14. Laundry Baskets

Again, I gave you some activities to do with your kids if that is something you like doing.

But, all you NEED to do is set out these items and give your kids access to them. You DO NOT need to or should even show them how to play with these items every single time.

Remember kids learn best through play when there isn’t an adult guiding them on what to do.

To me that is a big sigh of relief.

Happy playing

For your kids, not you, Mama! You get a break :-)

Check out my parenting guide, Now What?, for more help in promoting independent play.

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Lauren Barrett is a multi-passionate mom working to help all parents become their best selves and build positive relationships with their kids through mindful parenting. She has a degree in deaf education and a Master’s in Reading Education. She is a high school teacher of the Deaf and hard-of-hearing by day, a cross country coach by the afternoon, a writer/author by her son's nap times, and a full time mom to an amazing toddler. Lauren is a 2x author of the Add One-A-Day 30 Day Challenge and children's book, Henry's Hiccups, a blogger at Lauren Barrett Writes, and has been published on sites like A Fine Parent, Pregnant Chicken, Pop Sugar, Her View From Home, and Scary Mommy. She loves her faith, running, visiting MLB stadiums with her husband, chocolate, scrapbooking, pretending she would actually do well on the Amazing Race, re-watching The Office, listening to Bobby Bones, and helping out all moms. She lives in North Carolina with her husband, James, and son, Henry. Follow her on Instagram and get her free parenting checklists.

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